Today as I was reading my Bible, I came across some words like "kinsman" and "clan." These words created strong images in my mind of the bond between a tribe or family in Israel. It then led my mind to thinking about words we hear more today such as the Australian idea of "mate"ship or from Anne of Green Gables the term "kindred spirit." (Although my husband dislikes the later due to it's allusion to new agism). All springing forth images of sharing sweet friendship or the impression of strong family ties.
I wanted to share a little of my thoughts on true friendship this morning. The Lord has so blessed me with precious sisters in Christ that exhibit the whole picture of a true friend that I have a very clear defined image of what a "real" friend should be by their example alone. I remember them often in my prayers. Not only in supplication, but just in pure praise for the Father who brought them into my life and blessed me so. I also go to His word this morning as our wonderful Saviour, counselor, and friend tells us how he wants us to display friendship.
I have a dear friend that I have known since 1985. I just did some quick figuring (with my calculator :)...my poor homeschooled boys. Thank you for the computer math program) that's 28 years. Can it really be 28? Wow! She is still a part of my life on a regular basis today. What a blessing!!! I know that over those past 28 years I have stuck my foot in my mouth, played the fool, made wrong assumptions, said the totally inappropriate thing, my personality has grated, or just acted out of sin. Yet for nearly 30 years my dear friend still claims she knows me. Hee hee. Through ups and downs, marriages, babies, fun, and sad she stuck it out. Endurance takes flexibility and grace and... Gumption Girl!
I am an only child and really wished for brothers and sisters. The Lord has blessed me with another gal that is my sweet sister from another mother. She is my "go to girl." Aside from my husband she is my confidante, the person I can tell my secrets to and not be judged. I can call her in a moments notice over something as tiny as "guess what the dog just did?" or as deep as "I was reading in the Word and don't understand..." We laugh, we cry, we love each others children as if they were our own. Probably because we have walked the parenting road together for so long.
I have one more friend I want to share about. She is an example of always giving, always serving. If there is a need she will set down what she has going to be there. This beautiful gal is the absolute most thoughtful person I know. Whether it be a note, something made, or a little gift bought because she thought of you. Always thinking and praying about how to fill a need. Always asking about my family even in times her family has hardships. This friend is also the one who will call me out on sin. She understands the Biblical mandate of admonishment in love. She challenges me to ramp up my walk. I don't know if she knows this but the Lord has used her as an example in my life to be more like her.
I have other beloved friends that I will not go in to such detail about. Like the one I would not let go even after we stopped going to the same activity. I just keep calling her because I want to be associated with her. She's that cool! Or another that I have so much in common with her that we can talk for hours when we get together. How cherished each one as I can continue to count them...
Thinking of these special ladies this morning and seeing their faces in my mind, I turn in my Bible to read John 15:13 in which Jesus tells his disciples " "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."
Paul says in his letters to the early churches: (Be sure to read the rest after the verses)
Colossians 2:2 "...in that their hearts may be encouraged, having been knit together in love, and attaining to all the wealth that comes from the full assurance of understanding, resulting in a true knowledge of God's mystery, that is, Christ Himself"
Philipians 2:2 "...make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose."
Galations 3:28 "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female ; for you are all one in Christ Jesus."
Titus 2:3-5 "Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored."
Galations 5:22-26 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control ; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another."
Young girls can be quite catty. We all recall those Jr. High "click" days. Sadly I have come to the revelation that some women still remain in that place. I say "revelation" because I am somewhat still bewildered that that would take place among Christian grown women.We are all sinners and we all make mistakes, so I am not talking about those times we accidentally offend or in our sin we make the occasional poor choice. I am referring to those that reside there. They bring the moving truck and park all there stuff in the "In Crowd" manor.
I think we all know the folks that judge a book by the cover. And we're the book! "Who do you know?" "What are you wearing?" "How much money does your man make?" "What committee are you on?" take that further to--- Afraid to share their feelings to the other, not able to give or accept a genuine complement, afraid their friends will know the truth of there hard situation. You get the idea. Class-ism and pretense are alive right here in the US and worse right in our church. We draw lines public school/ homeschool, in crowd/ out crowd, pretty folk/ average folk, color of skin, and wealthy/poor...But the true friend looks at the heart. All of us have one. A heart that is. Do we dig deep enough to get to the bottom of it? Do we want to take the time? Do we think it messy work? Whether their "our type" or not.
Each soul is a magnificent creation made by God. What an exquisite thought to get to know His marvelous work in another. Value them for that. I have come to the conclusion that the Holy Spirit has revealed the concept of true friendship to some and others might be missing out on the blessing they could receive by showing it to others. For true friendship is focused on being a friend not on what we receive from the friend.
A friend does not care what your monthly income may be, she doesn't care who you know, she loves the Walmart purse just as much as the Coach. The genuine friend isn't impressed by your great accomplishments, they just want to hang with you. They are not always gloatfully one-uping but listening, praying, serving. Their main concern is your best interest. They want to race you to the finish line where Christ is waiting. They inspire you and encourage you.
Ok, here's the deal. I have much to learn about being thought-full and outwardly focused. I have a truly repentive heart for ways I treated and did not appreciate friends when I was young. I hope that thru my little soap box here you and I may be inspired to look at our desires to benefit and show deference to our friends. We are all one in Christ and should use His example to love our sisters in the faith. My "peeps", we have each others backs. I hope you have the joy of that kind of kinship, mateship, kindred spirit in your clan.
Let's go make some new friends, eh?
Proverb: A friend loves at all times.
I love this but insert the Word of God for encouragement :)
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